Preparing, crazy men and Parties

Hi,

I thought i would give a little update of my life nowadays
I'm mostly preparing for Paris, yes i'm finally going to the city i wanted to go to for ages. But i can't help but be sad because i'm not at the point in my life where i wanna be. Don't get me wrong i'm thrilled i'm going but i wish the circumstances were better.I'm not going with the guy i love like I've always dreamed. I'm going with school and i feel like i don't really know the people and like they don't know me. I know what you think what's a better way to get to know people than spend a whole week with them.  But it's my birthday that week and i have never been without my family and friends on my birthday and i don't think i can't. I truly love my Birthday because it's the one day a year i can truly be me and don't give a shit what people think because i'm only surrounded by people i love. And now i'm not it really gives me anxiety because i'm afraid people might ruin my special 21 birthday and it happened before some fuckers ruined my birthday and it hurt so bad but than god i had the people i love around me but now i don't have them if something happens. FML but enough with the complaining. As a gift for my Birthday my amazing ass sister is taking me too London. after almost 3 year i'm finally going back. Who would have thought i would ever go back. This is by far the best gift ever. London feels like my second home. The first step i took said it all. I had such an amazing time there.

So now on to the preparing.

The goodbye

hey,

So i know i promised to post this a month ago but i just couldn't it was just to hard. 

And i admit it's still hard but i wanna do it so here goes.

I promised bc and matt i would bake cupcakes so i did. 

and here are the reactions of everyone

- Kevin couldn't stop hugging and kissing me.

- Noah looked like a kid on Christmas morning.

- Kris just ripped of the paper cup and put the whole thing in his mouth and then he shouted "this girl bakes the most amazing cupcakes ever" ALL the women looked at me with envy.

- BC hugged me like a bear and started eating right away.

- Vanya was like i love these, i need to take a pic and post it onInstagram. 

- Cody smiled so sweet it made me blush and i felt really shy.

- Josh hugged me so hard i think i cracked a rib.

- Matt later said he loved it and that is was amazing again.

- Billy was really happy and after he ate it he was like "they get better everytime"

then the first goodbyes